To Be Or Not To Be

That is the question.

Many a great minds were consumed by the question, and many great minds came off second best. But if the likes of Vincent Van Gogh, Sylvia Plathe and Virginia Woolfe caved to the thought, how is the Average Joe supposed to refrain and thrive?

It's obviously not an act of intelligence (or lack thereof) with such highly renowned figures falling victim to the act of suicide. It is more a lack of will.
"Survival of the fittest" - since the dawn of time nature has had its way of keeping the strong alive and disposing of the rest. A friend of mine adapts his theory of evolution to the act of suicide. Natures way of 'weeding out the weak' - so to speak.

But we are all weak. All suffer the same negativity, the same pessimism and the same confusion.

"Sometimes I worry that I've lost the plot, my twitching muscles tease my flippant thoughts."

We all feel a little overwhelmed at times. That our life is spiralling out of control, unavoidable, chaotic. So what differentiates those who go through with it and those who don't? Resillience, determination, something worth fighting for? Who knows.

It will happen to us all eventually, even if it is not by choice, as often is the case. We all live, we all suffer, we all die. It's never been a question of 'if', but a question of 'when'. I'd like to say that I'm not afraid of death, but mother taught me not to tell lies. It's hard to not be scared, but I've heard that it's great.

"Don't you weep. There is nothing, as lucky, as easy, as free."

A battle of the mind. Death is seen as a release for some, liberating, salvation just waiting to happen. Nature just moves too slowly, hence why few take the matter into their own hands. A haven of comfort, an escape from despair, a shining light in the black abyss that is existence.

What we must realise, is that suicide is a choice like any other. Made, perhaps, by troubled minds, but a choice nevertheless. They choose to seek freedom, we choose to strive on. We are all entitled to feel sorrow, regret, even guilt. 'But don't you weep. There is nothing as lucky, as easy, as free.'

For those who remain, we too have a choice. A choice of happiness, it's just a battle of the mind. Happiness will come to those who search for it, provided they know where to look. One can accept that a life has been taken, accept that things will never be the same again, but also accept that it does not mean the end for everyone. People never forget, scars never heal, but happiness never fades for those who believe in it. A battle of the mind. You can choose to be a person who looks for the happiness, even if it takes years. Or you can let the sorrow consume you, and let the hurt and pain carry you away on the same path as all those lost before you.

"The night is darkest just before the dawn. But I promise you, the dawn is coming."

Will you search for it? To be or not to be, that IS the question.